I'm scared Ry.

I'm scared. I have made all the problems myself, and things are getting worse. I tried to get what I want, what I need. Now I don't have either. I thought, things would be different. I thought that things like that don't change. So, what do I do. Go home? Put up with the mom. Or start back over? To where people care, but not the one's that really matter. My mom. You. My sister. I don't love my dad. I can't do this, but at the same time. I could. I could rip out all my feelings, lock them away, until it is safe to give someone the key again. What would you do? Lock them away? Or continue to suffer? Everything is so..scary. Thats the best word for it. Everything happens so quickly.