Lies

You told me you would love me forever. You told me you would love me no matter what happened. You said you were nothing without me. You lied. Please, just. Show me you didnt

I am so in over my head. More fucking yelling.

I don't know.

After everything. I don't get the decentcy of a phone call or an email. You get your fucking friend to tell me. Thanks. Really Riley. You made my life and now took it away. How could you? I trusted you. Because you wanted me to. Just like the sex. You wanted to. Its not over now. Not in two weeks, not in a month. Because I know, or hope to whomever makes decisions, that you still love me. Right. That must be true. I hope it is. Because I am a mess. Mom has yelled at me every single day, and I am really starting to feel alone. What would happen now if I died. Would you care. Or just carry on like nothing ever happened. I'm guessing you spent friday with kevin. Another promise broken. What does it matter now. You can kiss kevin all you want, because you no longer have to "deal", with me. I feel so tired. I couldn't sleep. Its getting worse, i have been throwing up daily. Mom told me she is booking another doctors appointment. And btw. I was a fool. I thought I knew you. I was played.

Its monday may 31st. I know you won't be reading this. The rain is making it hard to try to sleep.

The rain makes it worse

Listen

Let it roll - Train.

Crazy

I am thinking about how often I hated myself for loving you. I am thinking about how it proved to be a very short leap from thinking, I am crazy about you, to thinking, I am just plain crazy.

The girl from dodge.

I have now been yelled at for 4 hours straight. I am inresponsible, and a creep. The "girl" doesn't want to talk to me, so move the fuck on. You say you don't want me anymore. So, what now. Now I lay on my bed, crying, and listening to music, which in turn makes me cry more. I feel like I did not know you, because you told me you would always love me. You lied. Maybe not.. I believe you still love me. So, in a way, I hope you will come around. 2 months of silence, or a month, and maybe you will carry on. Find a new boy? Summer romance. I don't know. I just know right now. And I know I should not be upset. I am constantly tired, and I don't know why. I woke up 3 times last night. Nightmares, and crying. I woke up sweating. I was shivering though. I could not get warm. And all I could think about was the day you feel asleep on my chest. And I then started crying, more and more. Hoping you will come around, and realize I am worth it. Worth getting in trouble. Maybe...maybe?

Mount Everest

It does not matter how many obstacles are placed in your path, or how tall they might be. You have what it takes to climb over them all. Fate will never ask you to do more than you are capable of, so don't worry if the mountain in front of you looks huge. You will find a way to move it.