HOW THE FUCK DID I FUCKING LET A YEAR GO BY AND FEEL SO FUCKING numb.
and how the fuck am i still here.
when all i want to do is be with you.
whicch i know won't happen.
SO, next thing to come along, which will be here one day.
soon, hopefully, for i'm feeling lonely, and i need someone who's on the same brain level as me. which i haven't found. yet. even though i've been all over this fucking town known as london. with this many people, why can't i find one.
cv.
thats all i think about.
why.
why
why.
and why, on this fucking date, can i still trace back the memories of my brain, and still feel each emotion of that horrible day, and will haunt me everytime i think about you. I remember you yelling at me on the street. And riding my bike and throwing it aside, and fucking yelling at you, telling you to finally talk to me.
I remember you telling me you hated me. I never gave up. I continued to love you, and love you, and love you. I made my life change, because you changed me, and in exchange. This pain and sorrow, this longing for fucking there to be tomorrow. with the only prospects of happiness is what i create, and control.
until someone else comes along.
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